To the editor
Let me share a story with you.
It’s March 2023. My son turned 1 earlier that year, and my husband and I are having a conversation about expanding our family. Being a working mom is challenging, and we are just starting to be comfortable in our home routine and my career is back where it was before baby. My boss reaches out to me about an opportunity to represent our team at work conference in June. I know I have to say yes, and agree.
Then it hits me: the conference is in Austin, TX. A place I’ve been a few times before, but now it means something very different. I tell my husband, and we both know that we have to put expanding our family on pause.
Why? Because, at 38, I’m what they called “advanced maternal age.” It’s better than what it used to be called (geriatric pregnancy if you’re curious), and at my age, the likelihood of a miscarriage is 1 in 3. That means I have a 33% chance of losing a wanted pregnancy, and though it would be safe for me to travel, it’s no longer safe for me to travel to the state of Texas. If I miscarry in Texas, I would not receive any care unless it’s a “life-threatening condition.” That grey language would leave me at risk to receive healthcare. Though I’m a citizen of the United States, the maternal care I would receive in Commonwealth of Massachusetts is vastly different than in Texas.
Let’s recap:
This would be a wanted pregnancy.
There is a higher risk to miscarry this pregnancy, given my age.
I’m in a lose-lose situation: say no, and limit my career growth; say yes, and limit my family growth.
Does that sound like freedom to you?
If you think the Dobbs decision isn’t affecting your neighbors, your friends, and your community members, you’re wrong. While I hope to never need an abortion, there are circumstances out of my control where that procedure is the only one which would save my life. Women are waiting in the emergency room, bleeding out, because doctors’ hands are tied. Miscarriage is common (25% of pregnancies), and some of my friends have miscarried late into their pregnancies – 5 months, 6 months, and 8 months. I know a woman who lost her son during the labor process.
I have also had a close friend who had received the most heartbreaking news – that her pregnancy isn’t viable as their child will be born with severe birth defects not comfortable with life – where they have to make a decision to end the pregnancy. This was a family who had picked out a name, started decorating his nursery, and was given the worst possible news imaginable. Keeping the pregnancy would have put her a greater risk, and would have likely made it harder for her to get pregnant again. While they might consult their parents, doctors, or a spiritual leader, is this decision made any better because the government is mandating it? She lives in Massachusetts, so thankfully she was able to receive an abortion. While she lost her first son, that life-saving care has allowed her to have two more.
Growing up in Massachusetts, I have a passion for history. I visited Plimoth Plantation as a kid and learned about Paul Revere’s ride. I read about Ralph Waldo Emerson, Frederick Douglas, and Henry Thoreau. I studied the Constitution and believe in the promise of America.
The first part of the first sentence of the First Amendment reads as follows: “Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of a religion…” We always seem to forget that part, instead reciting how the freedom of the press, speech, assembly, religion, and petition (yes, those are the five!) are granted to us.
I’ll repeat: “Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of a religion.” While abortion is a moral decision, access to health care is not. Religion should not dictate whether or not a person can get access to the care they need.
Even with the exceptions provided, mothers will tell you that just like not all children are the same, not all pregnancies are the same. We romanticize the different cravings, laugh at the mood swings, and smile at what-size-fruit-we-are-this-week. But, if something goes wrong, and someone you love needs care, they should be able to get it.
How frustrated would you be if you were having a heart attack and the doctor goes, “Well, it’s mild enough right now that “life-saving care,” isn’t necessary. Your blood pressure, while it’s dropping, it’s not below the range where I can act. Why don’t you wait and come back?”
The Dobbs Decision gave states the power to decide what freedom women have. My access to healthcare changes depending on what state I’m currently located in. Yes, my freedom changes when I cross state borders. This trickles down exponentially. I now have to decide what work opportunities I take as if I’m relocated, which in turn may limit my career growth, net worth, and savings opportunities for my children. I now have to decide if I can travel for family weddings, funerals, vacations while pregnant – once safe, now not so much. Being a citizen of the United States doesn’t matter anymore.
Just like the Jim Crow laws didn’t work in the south, we are seeing that this reality isn’t working for women. The Republican candidate for vice president is suggesting women take pregnancy tests at state borders. While many are laughing at the absurdity of it, it’s a terrifying proposition.
In school, I recited the Pledge of Allegiance every day, and it bears repeating, “with liberty and justice for all.”
When you vote on November 5th, please remember women’s liberty when you do.
Stephanie St. Martin
Lynnfield